Coming Out
by CullensTwiMistress
Summary: Sometimes the road to self discovery leads you into a path you never knew existed. Bella always thought she was happy, until she realized that there were other options out there. AH; BxE eventually.
1. Chapter 1

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>1.<p>

Today is my birthday.

I'm twenty-six.

Not sure how I feel about that.

Rose says I should be happy, 'cause I'm still young.

Of course she'd say that.

Being married to her high school sweetheart and having a beautiful little girl; her life is perfect.

Jasper doesn't want kids.

Well, not in the near future that is.

He doesn't even want us to move in together.

I'm not too happy about that.

I love him though.

And my older sister's right, I should be happy.

I wish I could change things; make them better.

I should start with getting out of bed.

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><p><strong>Sorry guys but if I hadn't replaced chapter 1, I would have managed to fuck up the chapter number somehow...not that I won't do that anyways but whatevs... lol<strong>

**Check out the links to the other stories in my faves or in the C2...**

**Drabble War participants: **

_**Masks**_** by Dalloway5906**

Summary: "I fucking hate New Year's Eve...all drunks and grabby hands...at least the tips are good." Bella thinks it will just be one more night at the bar, but tonight two men will change her life forever. e/b. Some dark moments but mostly snark and major sexy times.

_**Fear of Touch**_** by texasbella**

Summary: Due to a horrifying tragedy in his past, Edward is now an OCD headcase. He can't leave his house, he can't even open the front door without a clean pair of latex gloves. His hardest obstacle to overcome? Loneliness. This is where Izzy Swan comes in...as a hired companion. Will sparks fly or will she be too dirty for him? Rated M

_**Our Night of Fun**_** by FFLoverLaura**

Summary: 22 year old Bella is in college and having the time of her life. Her roommate gets married and moves out, leaving Bella in need to find someone to replace her. Enter Rose, the seemingly perfect roommate. What happens when Bella and Rose give in to their desires the night of their house party? This is their night of fun. Rated M for Lemons and Drug Use.

_**Destiny**_** by kitkat681**

Summary: 300 years watching everyone's joy. 300 years of emptiness. One little baby and everything changes. Then she's taken from him. Will he get her back? Vamp...rated M for...you know.

_**How it Goes**_** by JA Mash**

Summary: Isabella Swan is an actress... Edward Cullen is an actor... they're both secretly in love with their hot co-star... neither one knows what to do about it... this is the story of how it goes... Rated M for language and lemony goodness.

_**Class Act**_** by SexyLexiCullen**

Summary: Bella's English teacher, Mr. Cullen, can't stop looking at her like she's something to eat. She's cooking up quite the meal for him. Little does he know, revenge is a dish best served cold. But what if she has the recipe wrong? E/B. Canon couples. OOC characters. Rated M for language, lemons, and . . . I'm not done yet :) A bit on the dark side.

_**Whiskey Lullaby**_** by lvtwilight09**

Summary: Edward and Bella love each other beyond reason, but the demons from his past keep getting in the way. When Edward tries to save himself for Bella's sake, he may end up losing the one thing he can't live without. Rated M. Dark themes, heavy angst.

_**All the Fun of the Fair**_** by TrueEnglishRose**

Summary: Edward owns a fairground, drifting from town to town and Bella is a damaged soul, waiting to be saved. What magic has she weaved into Edward's life when he meets her? Can he save her in the way she needs? Rated M. Hurt/Comfort/Romance.

_**The Dealership**_** by Bnjwl's Fanfiction**

Summary: When Carlisle's Audi dealership is up for a prestigeous award, who pull out the big guns and help him win? Can Bella and Edward survive the tension of The Dealership?

_**It Is That Simple**_** by theonlykyla**

Summary: Bella's a twice divorced single mom dealing with a tragedy. Edward is a single lonely man with his own tragic past. Can they both open their hearts and accept the other? Romance/Angst

_**Where the Streets Have No Name**_** by DreamOfTheEndless**

Summary: The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Edward is firmly trapped in the hell of his making. Redemption lying just beyond his reach. Would Bella be able to be his salvation? Would she sacrifice herself to save him?


	2. Chapter 2

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>2.<p>

I need to make changes.

First things first: make a list.

Things I want before I turn twenty-seven.

How does 'be happy' happen exactly?

Do you wake up in the morning and decide that today you're happy?

Doubtful.

I am happy, generally.

That list.

What do I want?

An orgasm. One that I didn't give myself, of course. That'd be good.

What else?

I need a hobby. I hear writing is popular these days. Maybe I could start with this list.

Or a blog. Yes, blogging is popular with the young crowd. But then, that'd be too much like my job.

Ugh.

And I love my job so, clearly that isn't an issue.

Oh, I could maybe get a cat? Those are friendly and don't demand too much attention.

Then again, it would be sad to start the collection so young.

You know, 'cause when I'm old and alone, cats will be my only friends.

I suck.

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><p><strong>So I've replaced the Chapter 1 AN with the actual chapter but for those that had read it already well...it's here...ok? ok...**

**II hadn't done that, I would have managed to fuck up the chapter number somehow...not that I won't do that anyways but whatevs... lol**

**Check out the links to the other stories in my faves or in the C2.**

**Have fun! :o)**


	3. Chapter 3

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>3.<p>

"Bella, Jasper is going to be gone all night, you can't spend all that time at home alone." Alice yells at me over the phone.

Sometimes, I don't know why I even have her as a friend.

"Aww, fuck it, why not. What time?"

"I'll pick you up around nine thirty. It'll be fun, Bells. And you never know, maybe I'll even get myself something mouthwatering."

"Oh sweet Jesus, Alice. You need a girlfriend... or boyfriend. No wait, I forget, which side are you swinging with these days?"

"Ha ha ha, Bella. I fall in love with the person, not their sex. Although sometimes-"

"Stop! I was just kidding. Nine thirty, be at my door or I'm going to bed."

I hang up the phone and sigh.

I can't believe I'm doing this to myself.

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><p><strong>Oh and I forgot to give some love to my girls for pre-reading and helping me make this a bit prettier... WitchyVampireGirl and Scrimmy, I fucking LOVE you! (happy now? hehe)<strong>

**Check out the links to the other stories in my faves or in the C2.**

**Have fun! :o)**


	4. Chapter 4

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>4.<p>

After hanging up with Alice, mom calls and puts me on speaker and then proceeds, with help from dad and Jake to sing me happy birthday.

I'm laughing so hard, I have stomach cramps.

My seventeen year old brother would never make it in the first rounds of American Idol.

No. Way.

And I can just imagine my dad rolling his eyes at mom behind her back as she forces him to sing to the telephone receiver.

Priceless.

I miss them.

I should visit more often, it's not like they live that far away.

We live across town from each other for Christ's sake.

Mom reminds me that we have dinner reservations at six.

And that Jasper should come.

I remind her that he's on a business trip and only coming home tomorrow.

I'm not too happy about him missing my birthday.

But there's not a damn thing I can do about it!

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><p><strong>Good morning!<strong>

**Check out the links to the other stories in my faves or in the C2.**

**Have fun! :o)**


	5. Chapter 5

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>5.<p>

"So, Rose, what was the big news you wanted to tell us, sweetie?" My mom asks my sister mid dinner.

It hasn't escaped my notice that it's my birthday.

What the hell is Rose up to?

I take Lilly into my lap and play with her hair.

She's so pretty. A good mix between her momma and poppa.

Dimples and curls like Emmett with the softness and daintiness of Rose.

"Well, as you all know, I'll be twenty nine in a few months, right?" We nod and I notice mom's face break out into a big toothy grin.

Oh. God. No.

"There isn't really a way to say this without just blurting it out but yeah, we're pregnant."

I run a hand over my face, "Aww, fuck me."

"Bella, Lilly heard that." Mom chides and takes the baby from my lap and coos at her.

I look around the table and notice that nobody caught on except for her, "Mom, she's two. I don't think she cares."

"Bella, when you have kids, you'll understand."

And there it is, item number two to be added to the list.

The biological clock is ticking, apparently. Ugh.

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><p><strong>Here we go...<strong>

**Check out the links to the other stories in my faves or in the C2.**

**Have fun! :o)**


	6. Chapter 6

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>6.<p>

I smile at my sister and nod at Emmett, "Congratulations you guys."

"Hey, thanks Bells. So, when are you going to settle down and make me an uncle?"

Rose smacks her husband's arm lightly, "Emmett don't."

"Sorry, Bella." Emmett gives me a sympathetic smile and joins mom and dad's cooing over Lilly.

Rose turns to me, "What's wrong?"

I want to tell her everything.

I want to tell her I want her life.

I want to tell her I'm not sure about my future with Jasper.

I want to tell her so many secrets just so she stops placating me.

Like I'm not tired of hearing, 'there, there, Bella' and 'everything's okay, Bella'.

I want to yell, scream, jump out of my chair and ask why the fuck she chose my birthday dinner to announce that she's having another kid.

But I don't.

I won't.

"Nothing's wrong, Rose. It's the usual crap, you know." I sigh and shake off the queasiness, "Hey, if it's another girl, are you naming her Daisy?"

Rose grins, "You know me too well, sis."

Yeah, if only I knew myself.

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><p><strong>Are you reading the other stories?<strong>

**Check out the links to the other stories in my faves or in the C2.**

**Have fun! :o)**


	7. Chapter 7

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>7.<p>

After dinner is all said and done, I head home to my empty apartment.

My answering machine blinks with twelve unread messages.

Good thing I don't give out my cell number to just anyone.

I check my messages and smile as person after person wishes me a happy birthday.

It overwhelms me.

But the one person I wish would have called, doesn't.

I check my Facebook account and notice I have twenty-three well wishers there too.

Awesome.

But again, Jasper isn't there.

I'm hurt and angry.

I add item number three to the list.

Prioritize myself.

Because clearly someone needs to.


	8. Chapter 8

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>8.<p>

I shower and shave all the necessary areas.

I shouldn't bother, seeing as I'll be sleeping alone.

Again.

As always.

'Cause the man who loves me won't even sleep here.

'I don't like your bed', he says.

'I have to work in the morning', he says.

What. The. Fuck. Ever.

Excuses.

Asshole.

I take the vodka from the freezer and pour myself a shot.

After swallowing and reveling in the feel of it going down my throat, I get dressed.

Black skinny jeans. Tight, low-cut navy blue top showing off my assets. Black pointy heels.

I style my chocolate brown locks into lose curls.

Finish off the look with simple accessories and light make up.

Brilliant, I look at least twenty-two.

I probably won't get carded.

Awesome!


	9. Chapter 9

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>9.<p>

"Oh my God! You look fine with a capital 'F', girl. If you weren't already taken I'd be hittin' that!" Alice juts out her hip and smiles while wiggling her eyebrows.

"Sure, Allie. Whatever you say." I wave her off.

Not that I would be opposed to some exploring.

Lord knows I was always way too straight laced in college to experiment with that but, then again, I've always liked girl-on-girl porn.

Huh, maybe that's why none of the boys I've been with have ever been able to er, finish the job.

And calling them boys probably doesn't help my situation.

I feel bad though, 'cause Jasper tries so hard and I end up faking it every time.

After three years, you'd think he would have noticed.

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><p><strong>So... I hear y'all hate Jasper? Don't. He's not that bad... they're just not meant to be is all.<strong>

**Keep in mind that Bella is angry, confused, hurt, insecure, horny...confused. Mk?**


	10. Chapter 10

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>10.<p>

Things are spinning in my head as I ponder my latest thought.

Maybe I'm a lesbian. No... wait, I like cock so, "What makes you bi?"

"Ehmm, Bella, that's pretty simple. I like girls and boys. Sheesh, and you're the one with the education." Alice gives the cabbie directions to the club and turns to me, "Why are you asking?"

I shake my head. Deny, deny, deny... "I don't know."

"Well, if you ever want to give it a try, I'm here for ya babe!" Alice grins like the Cheshire cat, making me giggle.

I roll my eyes, waving her off once more, "Whatever, Alice."

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><p><strong>This is EB...jeez, people... TRUST ME! I have a plan, lol, don't you love when I say that?**


	11. Chapter 11

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>11.<p>

We get out of the cab and get in line in front of the club.

The line is long but we're early.

We want to sit and talk.

Sipping some drinks while people watching is always fun.

The nagging thoughts keep gnawing at me.

Would I be able to even touch another woman?

I like touching myself so...

"Bella, why are you so quiet? It's about time your man-meat comes home. You need to get laid!" Alice cheerfully announces over the crowd.

I've never wanted to kill someone so badly in my entire life.

That's saying a lot considering I have a younger brother.


	12. Chapter 12

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>12.<p>

"Shut the fuck up, Alice. Jesus." I smile to hide my embarrassment but it's fake.

Like so many things.

"Lighten up, Bellybeans! Get that stick out of your ass for once and loosen up." she grins.

Everything just rolls off of her.

I wish I were more like that.

"Yeah, well if this line could move it a long a bit more, we'd be golden!" I whisper-yell through clenched teeth, making sure the doorman hears me.

"This is great; I'm getting you all riled up. You're more fun this way."

I scoff, "Fuck you, Alice."

"Someday, baby. Mark my words, someday." She winks at me just as the doorman lets the next people in line, including us, walk into the club.

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><p><strong>Journey to self discovery, people! - Keep that in mind, mk?<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>13.<p>

We find a table and order drinks.

I hum and relax against my seat as I take a first sip.

The thought of letting loose and seeing where things go tonight is tempting.

I don't think Jasper gives a shit.

Fucker's not even here.

I shouldn't be mad. It's not like he's doing this on purpose.

A good work ethic is a definite turn on in a man.

But not calling your girlfriend of three years on her motherfucking birthday is practically unforgivable.

Alice leans over and whisper-yells over the music, "Stop thinking, you're ruining my fun."

I take a deep breath and nod, "I know."

"Hey, don't do this to yourself tonight. It's your damned birthday and you will have fun. Now dance with me, pretty girl!" Alice stands and pulls me up.


	14. Chapter 14

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>14.<p>

I stumble and giggle as the alcohol I've consumed settles into my body.

I'm not drunk. Not even close but I am feeling a good buzz.

The thinking ebbs for a little bit as we make our way onto the dance floor.

The music is typical. Modern bubble gum pop with a steady thumping beat.

Not something I'd listen to casually but it's awesome to get lost in when you just want to dance.

"See, this is good for you, Bella." Alice says as she sways seductively.

Her eyes are closed and she's just feeling the music as she moves.

She's beautiful.


	15. Chapter 15

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>15.<p>

We dance for a while.

Together and apart.

Some guys hit on us but Alice quickly dismisses them and grinds against me.

I like it.

After a while, we take a seat at the bar and get more drinks.

"So, I've been thinking that I need to make some changes." I say to my best friend. This statement comes completely out of nowhere.

I'm drunk.

No wait, I was drunk two Margaritas ago, so this makes me plastered.

I'm fumbling and sipping my drink.

Enjoying the warmth of it is soothing my body into a dull lethargic sense of ease.

It's also quieting my brain.

Thoughts aren't so jumbled; things seem clearer.

Inhibitions easy.


	16. Chapter 16

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>16.<p>

"Yeah? I was thinking the same thing. I need to make some changes too. Do you see that piece of yummy right there?" Alice drunkenly slurs and points to a tall bond preppy looking frat-boy.

"Frat boys, Alice? Even I'm not drunk enough to hit that."

"Well, apparently beer goggles will get me to fuck anything with a pulse."

"Ugh, that's just wrong."

"Why? Because he's a frat boy?"

"No, because he's currently hitting on that goth chick and she's obviously not into him."

"Didn't you know? Goth is _nouveau chic_. Everyone is doing it."

"To each their own." I take my glass and clank it against hers, downing the rest of my drink.


	17. Chapter 17

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>17.<p>

"Fuck, that cabbie was hilarious!" I giggle and stumble up to my apartment door.

Alice hangs on to my arm as she looses her balance and trips over her own feet, "I know! His rendition of 'I'm sexy and I know it' killed me."

"Dead!" I fumble around in my purse for my keys.

"Oh my God! Did you see the way he was eying us?"

"Yeah. He totally thought we were nuts."

As soon as the apartment door is open, Alice scoffs and goes into my kitchen mumbling something about Cheetos and Pepsi.

"I don't have either!" I call out to her as I head to my bedroom, take off my shoes and change into some sleep shorts and a comfy t-shirt.


	18. Chapter 18

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>18.<p>

"Here, have some water." I hand Alice a bottle of water and an oversized t-shirt she can wear to sleep in.

We've decided that she'd spend the night on my couch.

We do this a lot on nights we go out. We just haven't gone out in months.

She smiles and thanks me then goes into the bathroom to change.

When she comes out, half of her bottle of water is gone and her make-up is cleaned off of her face.

"I took some Ibuprofen from your medicine cabinet." She shakes the half empty bottle at me and giggles.

I nod and smile, "No worries. Make yourself at home."

Alice plops herself on the couch next to me and takes the remote from my hand, "I bet there's soft core porn on here somewhere."

"Seriously? I'm not getting any and you want me to watch porn?"


	19. Chapter 19

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>19.<p>

I come back from getting some Ibuprofen for myself and find Alice sitting on the couch.

And she found porn.

"Seriously, Alice?"

"Dude, that chic is hot and he's totally not doing that right." She stares at the screen wide-eyed and sips her water.

What the fuck did I just walk into?

"I'm going to go to bed."

"Oh come on, prude! Sit with me." She pats the spot on the couch next to her but her eyes don't leave the screen.

"Alice, I'm wound up as it is. Watching that," I point to the couple engaging in some sort of sexual activity on my wide screen, "is just making me want my vibrator. Stat."

"Well, I can help you with that."

"What the fuck ever, Alice."

"Just talk to me."

I huff and go sit on the couch next to her. I'm still drunk but the water and meds have had some effect on me already, "Happy now."

Alice grins, "Very."


	20. Chapter 20

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>20.<p>

I watch the television for a few minutes but the more I watch the more I turned on I get.

Alice starts rubbing my back; something she's done before.

A touch that used to sooth me as I cried on her shoulder suddenly feels intimate.

It may be the porn or the emotions I've been fighting.

It may also just be the crap Alice has been gouging into my head all night.

Would I like to kiss a girl?

I mean, this is Alice; she's kind of a whore. But a picky one at that.

I swallow a lump in my throat.

My skin feels like it's on fire and my breathing is labored.

I don't quite know what's going on with me but I close my eyes, lick my lips and do something I may just regret.

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><p><strong>Last one for a while, I had a break, lol<strong>


	21. Chapter 21

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>21.<p>

I lean into Alice's touch and turn my head to face her.

Her eyes are dark. Hooded.

She knows what she's doing. She's wanted this for so long.

I give into her our wants and close the distance between us.

Our lips meet in a soft kiss.

It feels strange. She's so soft; no stubble.

I like it.

Our mouths move together languidly.

Lips part; tongues mingle.

I move my hand into her hair and hold her face close to mine as we make out on my couch.

I moan as her hand moves to my breast where she expertly squeezes and tweaks my nipples.

* * *

><p><strong>JSYK this is a BxE fic... gimme a few chapters,mk? <strong>

**And no, he and Alice are not related... patience my sweets, patience... ;o)**


	22. Chapter 22

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

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><p>22.<p>

My sleep shorts are a mess; I'm so wet.

The couple on television is going at it; their sounds and moans mixing with ours.

Alice pushes me back onto the couch so she's beside me but still halfway on top.

She's a lot taller than me but not very heavy.

We both fit on the couch cushions mingled together side by side.

It's erotic; I haven't been this turned on in years.

Her thigh brushes up against my pussy eliciting a low moan from deep within me.

This is so hot!

Alice kisses my neck and runs her hand over my stomach, "Let me make you feel good, Bella."


	23. Chapter 23

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**HA! I knew I would fuck up the posting!**

* * *

><p>23.<p>

My eyes roll in the back of my head. This feels amazing, "Fuck Alice, if you only knew."

This makes her smile, "If I do something wrong or if you want to stop, let me know, okay?"

"Okay." I kiss her as her hand finds the elastic from my shorts.

A shiver runs through my body.

Anticipation. Trepidation. Want.

Everything.

I tentatively put my hand over her breast.

It's soft like mine. But bigger.

Alice cups my sex and moves her nimble fingers through my folds.

It feels amazing.

And she definitely has the right touch.

Could be because her equipment's the same.

* * *

><p><strong>I'm posting 'till chapter 30 tonight... <strong>

**Go check out the other warriors, I'm trying to get through their updates too!**

**And yeah, these characters of mine are WAYYYY out of character, lol... a tall Alice? ikr? lol**


	24. Chapter 24

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**HA! I knew I would fuck up the posting! go back and read 23... I fucked up! lol Ugh, I need a drink!**

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><p>24.<p>

As she gathers wetness from my entrance and guides her fingers over my clit, I'm already panting like a wanton whore.

I take my hand from Alice's breast and trail my fingers down her stomach.

I can touch too.

I want to, badly.

Making her feel like what she does to me. Reciprocating. Giving.

"This is about you, Bella. Your pleasure." She says as she removes my hand from her stomach and places it back to her tits.

I hiss as her mouth finds purchase on my neck, below my ear.

And her middle and ring finger circle my clit.

Magic fingers.

I arch my back and move my hips in time with her hand.


	25. Chapter 25

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**I fucked up the postings! yeay me! Ughhh... on with it...**

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><p>25.<p>

Before long, that tingle stirs up low in my belly as my orgasm approaches.

This is better than anyone's ever done.

Except for my own hands, that is.

"Holy, crap, Alice. Don't stop... please." I pant and moan and fall over the edge cursing up a storm.

Best. Orgasm. Ever.

Never in my life have I come so hard.

That's saying a lot since I've been masturbating since...forever.

"Holy fuck." I sigh as I come down from my orgasmic bliss. "That was awesome."

Alice's shit eating grin is priceless. She looks like a proud momma.

Kind of weird really. Just sayin'.


	26. Chapter 26

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**I fucked up the postings! yeay me! Ughhh... on with it...**

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><p>26.<p>

"There is nothing wrong with you, Bella. You just need to find the right partner." She says and kisses me once more.

I smile and relish in the feel of her and me together.

"I guess. I just...never thought it would be a girl." I say and then regret my words.

What does she want from this?

"Oh Bella, I don't expect you to fall in love with me. Besides, you already love me!" Her smile is infectious. We've both obviously sobered up quite a bit.

"That I do."

"This is pure fun. No strings. Beside, you like cock and want the whole shebang with the house and the picket fence. Personally, that shit is not for me."

"Ehm, you like cock too, Alice."

She gets a far away look in her eyes, "Yeah, I do, but I need to find my one that is attached to it."

I nod, "I know what you mean."

"Hey, are you going to tell Jasper about this?"

Fuck, I guess there's no way I can hide from this.

"I don't think I have a choice. Beside, he's not my one." I give her a tight smile and scrunch up my face.

There's no going back.

I have my list.

And I now know what changes I need to make.

"He's someone's one, Bella. You may just need to let him go."

I will.


	27. Chapter 27

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Anyone still with me?**

* * *

><p>27.<p>

Jasper calls me when he gets home.

Hearing his voice does nothing but irritate me.

And I thought I loved him?

If I did, I wouldn't have made out with Alice and let her get me off.

I get all tingly again just thinking about it.

"I missed you, baby." He coos into the phone.

If he were in front of me, I'd hit him.

I'm pretty angry but I try to rein it as much as I can.

Unsuccessfully.

"Do you know what day yesterday was?" I ask in a bitchy kinda tone.

"Saturday?"

"No, dumbass. Yesterday was my motherfucking birthday." I say; holding on by a string as my anger flares up.

At this point I'm a little bit passed irrational and bordering crazytown.

"Oh, shit. I'm so sorry, baby."

"Jasper, we talked about it for a week. Don't you remember?"


	28. Chapter 28

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**So this is pretty much as angsty as it's going to get...**

* * *

><p>28.<p>

"Yeah. Fuck, Bella, I was busy and-"

"You know what? Save it. We've been together for three years and you haven't even hinted at taking our relationship to the next level. I can't do this anymore."

"Bella, baby. Don't make any rash decisions."

"I'm sorry Jasper. This isn't working out. This weekend was an eye opener for me and I can't do this any longer. I'm not happy and I need to make things in my life better for me."

"So, what you're saying is that it's not me, it's you?"

I wipe the tears from my cheeks, "Yeah. I guess I am. I want for us to be friends though. I would miss you; I just can't do this anymore."

"Okay, Bella. Just think about this decision. If you need me, you know the number."

"Yeah, thanks." I sniffle and hang up the phone.

My heart feels heavy.

Reality that I've broken up with him settles deep into my bones and I let myself fall apart.

I go to my room and cry until I finally fall asleep.


	29. Chapter 29

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>29.<p>

"You'll be okay, Bella. It wasn't meant to be." Rose says over the phone.

I can't believe he posted it on Facebook before I even got a chance to tell my family.

I woke up on Monday with a bad headache so I opted to call in sick and stayed in bed.

Only to be woken up by my frantic mother who had to hear about my break up over social networking.

Fuck my life.

I calmly explained what had happened.

I didn't tell her about Alice, just the mid-twenties crisis I was having.

'Cause you don't do something like breaking up with your long term boyfriend unless you want drastic change.

And I did. Do. I really, really do.

After hanging up with her, I checked Facebook and, true to my mother's word, there itwas.

Jasper Whitlock was now single.

And so am I.


	30. Chapter 30

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>30.<p>

"Well, Rose I think it'll work out. I haven't felt this way...ever. New is good, right?"

I chew my bottom lip and listen to her as she placates me. I'll take it. It's Rose's way of soothing me.

She's better than my mother at that kind of thing. Plus she's hormonal which makes her extra nice.

For now, anyways.

"So, do you need to be set up with anyone? Scratch that itch, maybe?"

"Ehm, no. I've been single for forty eight hours. I think I can go a bit longer. I'll let you know if I need someone to, er, scratch that itch."

"Alright, well, Lilly needs me so I gotta go. Take care, sis. Love you."

"Yeah, yeah. Love you too." I unwillingly smile into the phone and hang up.

I don't have time to think before my boss walks into my office with a new employee.

* * *

><p><strong>I leave you with that for this evening! There are 80 chapters so... 30 tomorrow? 20 Sunday? We shall see...<strong>


	31. Chapter 31

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>31.<p>

"So, Mr. Cullen, this here is Isabella Swan. She will be your supervisor and you'll be working closely together on some of these projects so I suggest you get along." Aro says and winks at me.

If he weren't a flaming homosexual, it would be gross but coming from him, it's charming.

"Call me Bella." I stand and shake his hand.

"Edward." He smiles and I can't help but smile back.

He's very handsome. Tall, lean, reddish-brown hair and deep emerald eyes.

But I'm into girls, right?

God, this shit is really confusing.

"Well, I'll let you two get acquainted. Bella, be a dear and show Edward around, would you?"

I smile politely at my boss, "Yes, Sir."

"That's my girl." He winks again before leaving me alone with Mr. Handsomeface.

* * *

><p><strong>*yawns* morning everyone! Thank you so much for the overnight lovins, my box was stuffed this morning! now, let's meet Mr. Handsomeface<strong>


	32. Chapter 32

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>32.<p>

"So, I take it you're familiar with Macs?" I gauge his reaction. I don't know him from Adam but if he's working with me, he needs to know as much as I do.

"Yeah, that won't be an issue." he says and breaks out into another panty-soaking grin.

Sheesh... he's very attractive, I'll give him that.

"Alright well, this is your desk and your computer. Get acquainted with everything and I'll be right here if you need anything." I smile and sit back down at my own desk.

Which happens to be right across from his.

And all I can do for the next half hour is look at his face as he concentrates on his screen.

This is so wrong and... confusing.


	33. Chapter 33

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>33.<p>

A week flies by and even without Jasper around, I'm okay.

I thought I would miss him.

Miss hearing his voice.

Or his kisses.

Or his hands on my body.

Even without finishing, it still felt good.

I can't blame him.

It's my issue. Always has been.

But I don't miss him.

I just need to learn to deal and figure this shit out.

Alice called halfway through the week and asked if I was okay.

I think I'm getting there.

Maybe.

But seeing Edward every day is breaking me apart.

He's kind, funny and so, so sweet.

He brought me coffee; something nobody has ever done before.

It may have been to get into my good graces but the gesture made me blush profusely.

For the first time, someone did something for me without having to be told.

I'm not sure how to deal with that.


	34. Chapter 34

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>34.<p>

Alice suggests I try to go out with other women.

To figure out what's going on with me.

If it was a one time thing with her or if it's something I'm willing to explore.

I think I want to explore it but I have no clue how to do that.

How do you know if someone is gay or bi or whatever?

I mean, I can't put a label on it. On them. On me.

There are those who are more obvious, like Aro.

And then there's Alice who swings both ways.

How should I know whether or not I'm offending someone?

I can't even picture myself asking anybody out.

Not even a man.

Never have I been the one to ask.

I've always just been asked out.

Except with Alice but she had been so persistent, it was all so easy.

Well, she's easy in general. My best friend is kind of a whore.

I've said this before, right?

I guess I need to crack that shell and make things happen.

Ugh.


	35. Chapter 35

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>35.<p>

Another weekend goes by and before I know it, it's another Monday morning.

It's all so uneventful.

Meetings. Computers. Graphics. Websites. Clients.

And then there is Edward.

He's brought me coffee again.

So simple and thoughtful.

"You're spoiling me." I smile as I take a sip of the warm beverage.

Edward grins and takes his seat. "It's just coffee, Bella."

If only he knew how something so simple means so much.

"Yeah, well its pretty good coffee."

"It's from the place across town by my house. It's the best."

"I figured you'd like the good stuff."

He shuffles around some paperwork, "No Starbucks for me, thank you."

"Well, this is Seattle. You're kind of shit out of luck in that department."

"Well, my mom owns that coffee shop. Glad to see you think it's better than the giants."

"So much better." I revel in the taste. "Momma Cullen sure makes a good cup of Joe."


	36. Chapter 36

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Stick with me... we're almost there... **

* * *

><p>36.<p>

Discussions of coffee and deadlines drag on through the day.

Then before I know it, the entire week has flown by.

I haven't heard from Jasper in so long.

And I'm not bothered at all.

Maybe I should move on.

Go out and have some fun.

I've been single for a while.

If you count two whole weeks a while.

"Bella, you have to come and check out this club with me. I promise you'll have a good time."

I huff and roll my eyes even if she can't see me over the phone, "Fine Alice. I'm in but only because I need to get out of the house."


	37. Chapter 37

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>37.<p>

We go out but I don't have a good time.

I get hit on constantly by both men and women.

It doesn't feel right.

I'm not anywhere near my comfort zone.

"Bella, I think this answered some questions for you." Alice says as the cabbie drops me off.

"Yeah, oh Mystic One, this was a definite eye opener."

Alice grins and winks at me, "So, cock it is then?"

"Good night, Alice." I shake my head and smile as I close the door and watch the cab drive down the street.

I walk up to my apartment and think of that list.


	38. Chapter 38

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Patience...**

* * *

><p>38.<p>

_My list:_

_1 - An orgasm. One that I didn't give myself._

_2 - Be with someone that deserves me instead of grinning and bearing it even if it's not what I want._

_3 - Make myself a priority and let someone else take care of me for a change._

In a few weeks, I've managed to work on a few of those.

I got Alice to give me an orgasm. That was a first on so many levels.

I still need to work on asking for things and letting people do things for me.

Those are the harder ones.


	39. Chapter 39

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>39.<p>

As weeks fly by, I find myself more and more attracted to Edward.

Even if our interactions are mostly work related.

A few days before Christmas break, Aro talks to us about a new project that will need to be rushed.

"So, come to dinner with me?" Edward asks out of the blue.

We've been holed up in the office for hours.

"Sure, we could discuss-"

"No, no work over dinner. I'm sorry, just no." He smiles and shakes his head in emphasis.

I laugh, he's being so goofy.

His hair hardly moves though, I wonder how he does that?

How wrong would it be to muss it up myself?

I'd love to touch it.

Run my fingers through it.

"Bella? Are you coming?" Edward breaks me out of hair heaven.

Almost...

"What?" I look up at him and he's already got his jacket on.

Crap, I'm losing my mind.

"Yeah, sorry." I get my jacket on and follow him out the door.

It's colder now but the scenery's nice with all the holiday decorations.


	40. Chapter 40

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>40.<p>

"So, Isabella Swan, Tell me more about you."

His grin and the twinkle in his eyes make my belly do flip flops. I return his smile and answer him openly. I don't hide behind pretenses, I show him who I am. "I broke up with my long time boyfriend a few months ago because he kept taking me for granted. I think I'm into girls and you are the sweetest man I've ever met."

Okay, so I may have over shared.

"Wow, well, that's ehm, a lot of information." he says and his smile is still on his lips so, I guess I didn't completely freak him out.

Yeah me!

"And you, Mr. Cullen, what makes you tic?"

Edward sits back in his chair and takes a sip from his beer, "Well, I'm twenty-eight, single, live with my dog, Sam and work with the prettiest girl I've ever seen." He bites his bottom lip and his ears turn a dark shade of red while I'm struck speechless.


	41. Chapter 41

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>41.<p>

Edward's words don't fall on deaf ears.

I'm not stupid enough to let it go at that.

I may have thought I could switch teams just like that, but turns out, maybe I just like both.

I can live with it.

Especially with Edward.

"So, you like girls, huh?" He says tipping back his beer bottle.

"Well, I kinda like both, is that a problem?"

He smirks, "It's kinda hot, actually."

I lick my bottom lip and smile, "Yeah, it kind of is, but I don't share."

He purses his lips; eye crinkling at the corners, "I don't either."

I nod, "You want to get out of here?"


	42. Chapter 42

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Your reviews make me laugh... **

* * *

><p>42.<p>

"Where to, my lady?" Edward holds the door for me as we step out of the restaurant.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

"Thanks." I look around and the mood music playing over some outdoor speakers along with the Christmas lights scattered around some of the trees in the park across the street look so pretty, "How 'bout we go for a walk?"

The wind has died down as twilight settled in, making the evening air cool but not too bad.

"Alright, sounds good to me." He smiles down at me; eyes twinkling in the soft glow of the street lights.

How could I even think of denying myself?

Getting what I want is on the list, right?

As is making things appen.


	43. Chapter 43

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>43.<p>

Edward offers me his hand and I take it greedily, wrapping my small fingers around it.

Downtown area this time of year is always mesmerizing.

I kind of wish we had snow.

It would make the entire thing like some storybook romance.

"What are you thinking?" he asks. His voice is soft; different from what I'm used to.

He's usually so professional yet funny.

Always sweet.

"Nobody's ever asked me that." I look up at him in wonder.

"Well, let me be the first."

My heart melts with his words.

Without knowing it, Edward Cullen has just made me fall in love with him.


	44. Chapter 44

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>44.<p>

We walk through the park hand in hand.

We talk about random things.

Conversation flows nicely between us. It always has.

"So your mom owns a coffee shop?"

"Yeah, she's been asking to meet you." he smiles shyly.

"So you told your mom about me?"

"Yes. No. Well, she asked why I was ordering two coffees." His cheeks blush pink and it's definitely not due to the cold.

"You could have just lied." I tease.

"Nah, my mom and I are close. I'm an only child. Besides, she's always been able to tell whenever I've fibbed."

I tug at his hand lightly, "Momma's boy."

"And proud of it." He tugs back; playful, "What about you, any brother or sisters?"


	45. Chapter 45

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**I'm so happy you guys have stuck with me this far! So many had negative responses to Bella's actions but, in life, it's not always sunshine and roses and sometimes you have to step out of the box to find what you want! :o) **

* * *

><p>45.<p>

"Ehm, well, I have a little brother, Jake. He's annoying as hell but I love him. And I have an older sister. Rose is married and has a daughter. She and her husband Emmett are expecting in May."

We continue walking down a secluded path toward the outdoor rink.

"Rose and Emmett? Wait, you're Emmett's sister in law?"

I stop in my tracks, "Yeah. You know him?"

"Ehm, only since we were ten years old."

"How is it I've never met you?"

He smiles, "I was in Chicago when he got married."

Oh my God, "So, wait. You're _that_ Edward?"

His eyes narrow, "What have you heard?"

I giggle, "Nothing bad. God, this is amazing."

"Tell me."

"Emmett was upset you hadn't made it to their wedding. Does he know you're here? I mean, I haven't heard him say anything about you."

"Yeah, but I told him to stay out of my love life."

"Ha, I said the same thing when I broke up with Jasper."

"Wow. This is a coincidence." He says and turns to me, serious.

I look up to meet his eyes, "Good or bad?"

He smiles, "Very good."


	46. Chapter 46

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>46.<p>

I blush as the heat of his proximity and his gaze envelop me.

I feel like it's just me and him in this whole universe.

"Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I kiss you?"

I'm lost in warmth and need in his eyes, "Please."

Edward's fingers caress my cheek as he pushes the hair off of my face.

I bring my hand to his side and grab onto his jacket for support as I get up on my toes.

He closes the distance between us and kisses my lips softly.

I respond quickly and kiss him back.

It's chaste and sweet.

And so, so hot.

He pulls me against him with his other hand as he wraps his arm around my waist.

He suckles lightly on my bottom lip, nibbling at it playfully.

"I've wanted this for so long." He says against my lips between kisses.


	47. Chapter 47

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>47.<p>

I draw him closer to me and run my tongue over his bottom lip.

He opens his mouth to me and, as his tongue meets mine, I moan into his mouth.

We kiss slowly, languidly as his fingers caress my cheek, jaw and neck.

The sensation of his hand and fingers on my skin are turning me on beyond anything I've ever felt.

Which is strange and new for me.

My breathing is erratic.

His is just as bad.

I don't want to stop kissing him.

Ever.

But a throat being cleared close to us breaks us apart.

My lips curl into a smile, as does his.

It all feels like a dream.

But a good one.


	48. Chapter 48

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>48.<p>

"It's getting late, we should go." He says but doesn't move.

I smile, "Yeah, work tomorrow and all. I hear your boss is a hard ass."

"Nah, she's tough as nails on the outside but inside, she's a real sweetheart." He smirks and looks away; blushing lightly.

"Yeah? Must be 'cause you're easy on the eyes." I tell him and tug him firmly against me.

With our thick winter jackets on he feels all bulky but I've had such a long time to watch him move around the office in his fitted knit sweaters and jeans, I know otherwise.

I wonder what's underneath all the clothes...

"Why are you blushing, pretty girl?"

"I was ehmm... hey you were blushing too." I narrow my eyes at him making him smile back at me.

He kisses me again, chastely and finally lets me go, "Ha! And I am not telling you why."

"Someday, Mr. Cullen, I will coax it out of you."

He simply smiles and nods, "Someday."


	49. Chapter 49

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>49.<p>

Waking up this morning, knowing what it's like to kiss Edward is making my insides all jumpy and my belly all jittery.

I'm excited to see him, but trepidation over our changing relationship lingers in the back of my mind.

Company policy says nothing about inner office dating.

Aro is living with his assistant.

Ben, our programmer, is married to Angela, the receptionist.

They all seem to make it work.

I get to the office and have a seat. It's customary for me to be earlier than anyone else. Usually, Edward comes in about half an hour later.

This morning though, he gets here only five minutes after I do.

It's just the two of us and mixed tension in the air.


	50. Chapter 50

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Last one for a little while...**

* * *

><p>50.<p>

Edward sets my coffee on my desk as he does every morning, then walks over to his computer and turns it on.

I watch him move around but all I can think of is having his mouth on mine.

His body moving with mine.

The feel of his skin under my fingers.

"Are you okay, Bella?"

"Yeah, why?"

"You look all flustered." He smirks.

I shake my head and try not to smile but fail miserably.


	51. Chapter 51

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Dinner is over and done with. Kids are in bed. The mister is still plowing...snow. And here we go...**

* * *

><p>51.<p>

"I ehmm... what are you doing here so early?" A girl can hope that he wants to see me as much as I want to see him. Right?

"We have that project due tomorrow and I figured I'd get more done this way."

I nod, "Makes sense I guess."

I can't help but sound a little disappointed in my response as I turn to my computer and start fiddling with the site I'm working on.

I lock my eyes on my screen and work.

It's not until Edward's hand is on my cheek that I notice he's moved around back to my desk, "Oh, and I kind of really wanted to see you."

His smile is guarded as he gauges my reaction.

I smile and lean into his touch, "Thank God."


	52. Chapter 52

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Awe fuck me, I did it again...**

* * *

><p>52.<p>

The rest of the week flies by.

Edward is so easy going and shows genuine interest in me.

It feels so good.

And weird.

And unexpected.

Friday afternoon, we hand in our project to Aro in hopes that everything will be good at least until we come back to work on Tuesday.

Somewhere along the way, my list gets tossed to the side.

As I look it over I realize that they were ridiculous requests to begin with but, I'm glad they started the ball rolling.

Christmas Eve is tomorrow and I have plans with my family.

I invite Edward to come with me to my parent's house for dinner.

He accepts but makes me promise to go with him for lunch with his own parents on Christmas day.


	53. Chapter 53

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

***eyeroll* go back and read 52...I screwed up again...**

* * *

><p>53.<p>

Christmas Eve day rushes by quickly and before I know it, Edward is knocking on the door.

I haven't told my family about him.

Of course, as soon as Emmett sees him at the door, he just assumes that Edward is there for him.

Until I walk by and kiss Edward's cheek while taking his jacket.

"So let me get this straight. You two are what, dating?" Emmett booms out with a laugh.

"Shut up, Em. I happen to like this one." I tell him with a smile.

"He's a good guy, Bella. Be good you two." Emmett says with genuine interest.

It's strange coming from him, but comforting too since Emmett is like my older brother and watches out for me.

Dinner goes well.

We all laugh and Edward blends in well within our dynamic.

This is so nice.

Jasper hated this kind of thing.

I'm falling more and more in love with Edward with every day that goes by.

Could he be my one?


	54. Chapter 54

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>54.<p>

After reading over Edward's instructions, I make my way to his house on Christmas day.

He'd told me to be there around eleven so, I made sure to leave my house early enough to get there on time.

My time with him is precious.

I've gone ahead and baked some cookies to bring over to his parent's house.

I hate going anywhere empty handed.

"You didn't have to do that." He smiles and takes the tin of cookies from my hands.

"It's my pleasure. They're my specialty." I smile and want to kiss him.

We haven't shared a kiss since that night at the park and I'm desperate for it.

My vibrator's been seeing a lot of attention lately.

And I only have Edward to blame.

I make a mental note to check on Alice since she's been MIA since the last time we saw each other.

Huh...

"Come meet my parents." Edward smiles and takes my hand as we make our way to the kitchen.


	55. Chapter 55

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>55.<p>

"This is my mom, Esme and my dad, Carlisle."

"Hello, Bella. Nice to meet you." His mom smiles genuinely and looks us over.

"Yes, it's about time Edward brings someone to meet us. We thought he was going to turn into a bachelor." Carlisle smiles too but it's tight.

I sense tension in Edward as he inhales and tightens his hold on my hand.

"Well, I'm about this close to becoming the local cat lady so, we're well paired." I reply without thinking.

Esme giggles, "Oh, I like her spunk. Carlisle, leave the boy alone."

"What? I want grandchildren already."

My heart breaks a little as I look up at Edward's sullen expression, "Hey, show me around the house."

"Oh, good idea, Bella." Esme wipes her hands on her apron and unexpectedly pulls me into a hug, whispering, "I like you already."

I feel my face heat up at her words.

"Alright, let's go, beautiful." Edward leads the way out of the kitchen.


	56. Chapter 56

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>56.<p>

Edward shows me around the main floor then takes me upstairs to his old room that is currently used as a spare bedroom.

He doesn't say much as we peruse each room. I don't like it, "Talk to me."

"Sorry about my dad, he's... intense."

"It's okay. My mom is always on my ass about grand kids too."

"At least your parents have Lilly, mine just have me and it's apparently not good enough."

I put my arms around him, "Don't do that." I whisper against his chest, "You're good enough. Fuck, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Edward wraps his arms around me and pulls me closer; kissing the top of my head, "Ditto."

I look up into his eyes and see so many things there.

Things we aren't quite ready to say, but at least they're there.

I stand on my toes and kiss him gently.

It doesn't take very much for our kiss to get heated as Edward tightens his hold on me.

I can feel him hard against my belly, the thought of him inside me elicits a moan as he breaks the kiss and nibbles on my jaw and throat. "Fuck, Edward, I...so good."

I let my hands roam his body a bit and play with the tendrils of hair at his nape.

As suspected, it's actually soft between my fingers.

And, as if on cue, his mom yells from the stairs, "Lunch is ready."

Ugh, fuck my life!


	57. Chapter 57

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>57.<p>

Lunch is pretty quiet.

I have a feeling Esme gave Carlisle a good stern lecture because he's being pleasant with us.

It's much better than our earlier interaction.

Edward smiles more as we make conversation.

Things are light and nice.

After lunch, I help Esme with the dishes.

She lets me know, in no uncertain terms, that she adores me.

Which makes me laugh.

She's so nice. I can see where Edward gets his charm and personality from.

After the dishes are done, I join Edward and his father in the living room.

We sit together as his father plays a piece on the piano.

It's lovely and moving.

But what really leaves me breathless is when Edward takes his father's place and plays an original piece.


	58. Chapter 58

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>58.<p>

"So I guess I'll see you Tuesday?" I look up at him, hopeful that maybe he wants to see me before that.

Edward's hands are on my hips as he stands in front of me, "Can I see you tomorrow?"

I smile, "Come over to my place, I'll make dinner."

He nods, "Dinner."

He leans in and kisses me chastely.

I know his mom is probably watching us like we're a couple of teenagers.

It's nice, if not a little overbearing but I get it.

Edward hugs me and opens my car door, ushering me out of the cool air.

I wave at him and his mom as I back out of the driveway.

When I get to mom and dad's house, I get the Spanish inquisition.

So many questions.

I answer none of them.


	59. Chapter 59

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>59.<p>

I wake up and call Alice immediately.

We chit chat but something is off.

"Is it because we, ehm... fooled around?" My paranoia getting the best of me.

"Oh God no, Bella. Sweetie, I... listen you're my bestie, right?"

"Always, Alice. What's going on?"

Her tone is odd even for her, "I met someone."

"O-kaayy, and this is bad how?"

"It's Jasper."

Now, because she's my best friend, I'm going to take a deep breath before I cut a bitch, "Say what?"

"I'm sorry, Bella. We were both at the same club a few weeks back and we started talking, about you actually. Nothing bad, just that he took the break-up way better than expected."


	60. Chapter 60

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Last one for tonight! See you tomorrow... :o)**

* * *

><p>60.<p>

I sigh and make a fist, I mean come on, "Oh, and did you tell him about... you know?"

"God no! Jesus, woman, I wouldn't have betrayed you like that."

"But you two are dating?"

"Well, we weren't going to but he insisted. I have to say, Bella. He's not the same as I thought he was. All that time with you, I don't think he was ever happy."

"That makes two of us." I mumble under my breath.

"I'm really sorry, Bella."

"Whatever, Alice. Just, give me time."

"I can do that. By the way, how are things with the assistant?"

I frown, "How did you know about that?"

"Rose told me yesterday morning when she called to wish me Merry Christmas."

"I think he's my one." I sigh and smile at my own statement even if part of me wants to kill her.

"That's good to hear, Bells. I only want the best for you, you know."

"I know."


	61. Chapter 61

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Good morning! :o)**

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><p>61.<p>

Alice's confession weighs heavy on my heart for a bit but I decide not to let it bother me.

As her best friend and his ex; I know they have more in common than we ever did.

But I push those thoughts aside as Edward pulls up in my driveway.

I open the door, smiling brightly; excitement all over my features, "Hey."

Edward's grin mimics my own, "Hey."

I open the door wider and invite him in.

I barely get it closed before his lips are on mine.

I moan and pull him closer to me; gripping his shoulders, his ass, anything I can as his mouth and tongue work magic with my own.

We will not be eating dinner.

I'm okay with that.


	62. Chapter 62

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>62.<p>

Edward's hands are hesitant on my shoulder.

He respects me so much, it's cute.

And sweet.

And right now, I want him everywhere on me; in me.

"Oh God...," I move my neck and enjoy the feel of his tongue and teeth there.

I unzip his jacket as his mouth licks and nibbles at my skin.

Edward helps me get him out of his jacket then stumbles around my foyer as he takes off his shoes. I giggle as he holds onto me for leverage, "Are you making fun of me?"

I smile innocently, "Of course not. I would never."

My smile however turns into a giggle as Edward finishes taking off his shoes and lunges for me.

He tickles me relentlessly as I thrash in his arms.

Carefree. Warm. Inviting.

"Stop, please." I giggle some more and pry my hands free so I can do the same to him.

We're breathless as we stumble to the living room.

It's not where I want to be with him right now.


	63. Chapter 63

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>63.<p>

He takes a seat on my couch and instead of sitting next to him, I straddle his lap.

I need to do things for me; take more of what I want.

Meh, it's on the list.

I lean in and kiss him, relishing in the feel of him underneath me.

I kiss my way down his throat, and bury my nose in the crook of his neck; inhaling his scent as I grind myself against him.

I'm so wet and want him so much.

Judging from the bulge, he does too.

"Would it be too forward to ehmm...what I mean is, er... fuck this is not going as well as planned." I bury my face in his shoulder as my face heats and turns bright red.

"Are you telling me you want to sleep with me?" Edward's voice is alight with humor.

I'm not laughing, but yeah, I so want to sleep with him.

After I fuck his brains out.

"Yes." I nod and mumble against his shoulder.

"Good thinkin', pretty girl." With that, Edward tightens his hold on me and gets up off of the couch, still holding me against his chest, "Where's your room?"


	64. Chapter 64

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>64.<p>

I giggle as Edward throws me in the middle of the bed then proceeds to crawl over to me.

He's smiling and playful.

I love him this way...

"Holy shit." I stop mid-thought as I look at his happy face.

His features quickly turn from happy to worried, "Are you okay?"

I smile and nod, "Yeah, I am." I lick my lips, "Now, how do we do this again?"

Edward chuckles, "You did not just ask me that?"

I shrug, "It's been a while."

And it has. Jasper was... oh God, I can't remember. Well, that's sad. Then there was Alice but, that wasn't sex, she just rubbed my clit 'till I came. I do that to myself all the time.

Edward smirks, "It's been a while for me too, I had a thing for this chick at work and-"

"Edward?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up and kiss me."


	65. Chapter 65

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>65.<p>

I sit up and take off my shirt as Edward does the same.

There's no getting out of this.

I want him. Badly.

"You're beautiful, Bella." He says against my collarbone as he reaches behind me to undo my bra.

I let it fall and toss it aside.

Edward captures my nipple into his mouth, suckling on it greedily as his fingers work their magic on the other one tweaking it, making moan and writhe beneath him.

I can feel him hard and thick under his jeans as he moves between my thighs. His bulge rubbing against where I want him most.


	66. Chapter 66

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**I just noticed that when I counted and numbered my chapters I went from 65 to 70 so this means that I have 75 chaps instead of 80...sorry, even my pre-readers didn't catch it, lol.**

* * *

><p>66.<p>

Before long, dry humping isn't enough.

I bring my hand in between us and fumble with his button-fly.

While doing so, I run my hand along his length, making him hiss.

"Fuck, Bella. Are you sure?"

"I'm so sure, Edward. If we don't do this, you'll have to help me rub one out."

I don't tell him I might not be able to relax enough and be comfortable enough to come for him.

But I have a feeling I won't have to fake anything.

Edward moves off of me and gets up off of the bed.

With the soft glow coming from the light in the kitchen, I see him move around in the room.


	67. Chapter 67

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>67.<p>

Edward slips off his pants and underwear, letting them pool to the floor.

He then crawls back up on the bed and gets my pants undone before slipping them off of my legs.

I lean on my elbows and wordlessly watch his every move.

His deft fingers settling on my thighs as he crawls up to capture my lips in a searing kiss.

His hand moves up my thigh and his fingers graze my heated center making me whimper.

My underwear are drenched with my arousal and with every move he makes, I feel myself get more and more turned on.

It's never been like this for me.

Not with a guy.

Certainly not with Alice.

"Let me take care of you, Bella."

I nod and moan as his deft fingers make quick work of taking off my underwear.


	68. Chapter 68

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>68.<p>

"Mmm, you're bare?"

"I just ehmm...yeah?"

"Oh God." Edward whimpers as he kisses my inner thigh. It's almost enough to make me come right then and there.

I run my hand through his hair.

I may have nudged him a little. Making him chuckle, "Jeez, woman. Patience." He says then dives into my pussy taking long licks from my entrance to my clit.

There is not one coherent thought going on in my head.

Not one, as his tongue works its magic flicking over my clit and licking my juices.

I moan and curse, fisting the sheets and arching my back.


	69. Chapter 69

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>69.<p>

I can't focus on anything as I feel my orgasm approach.

Edward then slowly slides his middle finger inside me, hitting that magic spot right away.

I can't focus on anything and for the life of me I don't understand why I haven't met this man before.

As Edward suckles and flicks my clit with his tongue and pumps his fingers in and out of me, my orgasm hits and consumes me.

It's so good, if I didn't know any better, I'd think I was dead.

I moan and thrash against his face as his tongue lavishes my kitty.

I feel his lips curl into a smile against my overheated sensitive skin as I come down from the best orgasm I've ever experienced.

Edward then kisses my mound and belly as he makes his way back up to my face, wiping his chin against his forearm as he crawls up my body.


	70. Chapter 70

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>70.<p>

"So, I take it you enjoyed that?" he says with a smirk.

I grin lazily, "You have no idea."

My limbs feel like Jell-O.

That was...I have no words.

Now, why couldn't I have that with anyone else?

Not that I want it with anyone else.

"Good." Edward smirks, obviously proud of his good work and kisses my lips.

I love the taste of me on him.

It feels naughty and erotic as our tongue mingle together.

His taste with mine, intertwined... it's delicious.

I'm finally able to catch my breath as Edward kisses my neck and collarbones.


	71. Chapter 71

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>71.<p>

I snake my hand in between us and take him in my hand.

His cock is long and thick, not too big.

Perfect.

I pump him a few times and hear him groan above me as he peppers me with kisses.

"Bella, if you keep doing that I'll come all over you."

I sigh, "That'd be hot."

"Oh, so naughty, Ms. Swan."

I smile against his lips, "Hmm, you haven't seen anything yet."

Edward groans, "Oh God, Bella. I need to be inside you."

He goes to get up but I stop him by warping my legs around him, "I'm on the shot."

"Oh thank God. I want to feel you, all of you."

Oh sweet Jesus with the dirty talk...

"Yes please... Edward." I whimper and push his ass with the balls of my feet. Urging him forward.


	72. Chapter 72

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>72.<p>

Edward grips his cock and slides it within my folds, gathering wetness before pushing into me slowly, letting me adjust to the feel of him.

I throw my head back and hold onto him as his mouth latches onto my skin.

His tongue and lips flick and lick both breasts while he thrusts in and out of me.

I feel the tightening in my belly as another orgasm builds up while his pubic bone rubs against my clit lightly with every thrust.

I'm panting and moaning against his mouth as we simply breathe each other's air.

I know he's close and so am I.

I've felt this way so often before.

Right on the verge.

But this time, it's all so very different.

"I'm so close, Edward." I whimper.

"Fuck, baby. Rub your clit for me. I need to feel you come on my cock."

Hottest line I've ever heard right there, folks.

I do as I'm told and come, chanting his name.

It doesn't take long for Edward to follow suit, grunting and panting as my name rolls off his lips.


	73. Chapter 73

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>73.<p>

He cradles me to his chest and I fall asleep with the rhythm of his steady breathing against my ear.

I wake up early to the sound of my alarm clock blaring in my ear.

I turn and stretch then realize that there is a warm body lying beside me.

"Hey beautiful." He says against my shoulder.

I smile, "Good morning."

"Want to go get breakfast?"

I'm starving after skipping out on dinner in order to have sex.

And an orgasm.

No, make that two.

With a man no less.

Yea me!

I nod, "Yeah, I have a feeling today's gonna be a good one."

We get up and move around.

It's not as awkward as I thought it would be.

We head out to breakfast and talk about nothing and everything.

Sex hasn't made everything strange, which is nice.

It's great actually.

Our day at work comes and goes.

Edward comes back home with me and... doesn't leave.

We do this for weeks.

My apartment then his house.

Eventually, we move into his.


	74. Chapter 74

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

* * *

><p>74.<p>

Edward is wonderful.

The last months have been quite the voyage in self discovery.

Edward's shown me how to really love.

And Alice well, she showed me how to open up; let myself just go with the flow.

I guess I did have that stick up my ass at some point.

She did an awesome job of removing it.

Along with some inhibitions that were apparently stopping me from having an orgasm.

To this day, I still wonder why it took so long for me to realize my worth.

Those days have since gone out the window.

Along with the thought of getting a cat.


	75. Chapter 75

**SM owns Twilight. Me... not so much!**

**Sniff :'o) **

* * *

><p><strong>Epilogue...<strong>

75.

I'm 27 today.

I like it.

I think I'm even happy that I'm getting older.

Wiser.

We're having a party later.

Family, friends, everyone will be here.

Even Alice and Jasper. They do make a good couple.

I've accepted their relationship.

And now, Edward and I have an announcement to make.

No, I'm not pregnant, although both our sets of parents would love that.

We're actually getting married.

Edward and I, yeah, we're doing that.

And maybe someday, we'll even do the baby thing.

**THE END**

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><p><strong>Thank you to each and every one of you that took time to read and enjoy this little story. It means the world to me to have your support. <strong>

**A huge thanks goes out to my girls who participated in this war with me. They are awesome! :o)**


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